[ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
. Chapter 318:16pmI finish wiping my face from washing the day away.I can't help but observe Jay and take him in.Tomorrow he'll have the file to give to Vault, and in return he'll get the dagger he needs to send mehome.I'll have to let him go all over again.My chest caves in.I'm not sure if I'm strong enough to say goodbye again (not like I did it all thatwell the first time around).How do I learn to let go and not have it crush me? I'm not sure that I can.I need him, if only for tonight.Not sexually; I just need to feel him one last time.I go to the side of his bed where he is watching the news and crawl on top of him, placing a bentleg on both sides.I wrap my arms tightly around his neck and bury my face in it's crevice.I breathe inhis scent and relish in the warmth of his body.His arms safely tuck me in and a hand starts strokingmy hair, the other securely embracing me.I breathe more of him in and soak in every memory I haveof him, praying I never forget a second of it. I love you, I exhale, needing to get the words out, wanting him to know before I don't have thechance to say it.His lips move against my temple and it makes me tighten my hold around his neck, If you'reworried about tomorrow, don't be.You don't have to do it.I'll find another way.I would prefer tohave to find another way. That's not what this is about.After tomorrow this will all be over and I'll never see you again.Last time I didn't get to say goodbye, or tell you how I'd never forget my time with you.I love you,Jay.I wanted to tell you.I know it's only one-sided, but I still needed you to know. I fight the tearsthat are blurring my vision and cling even tighter to him.Jay clutches me tighter as well, and the hand stroking my hair knots itself with the strands,pressing my face firmly to him. I want to tell you a story about a six year old boy named Noah Baxter, Jay inhales deeplybefore letting it all out in one big whoosh across my temple, ruffling my hair, giving me the tingles Iwill miss, He had a beautiful mom, with long blond hair he loved to touch because of it's softness,and the way it glowed like an angel's.She had a sweet, soft voice that never yelled, only soothed.Shecalled him her perfect boy even when he made mistakes or lashed out.This boy loved her macaroniand cheese, and even as a grown man can remember the taste in his mouth. One day, the boy and his mom were coloring in the living room when cries of terror came fromoutside.His mom rushed to the window and peeked out.The horror on her face frightened the boy.Hebecame scared when she yelled at him to go to his secret spot in the back of her closet.His mothernever yelled at him and he stayed rooted in shock.When she yelled a second time he obeyed and wentto the small, snug compartment his dad made him inside the closet wall and locked himself in.Hecurled up into a ball, and as he waited for his mom to come get him he trembled and cried, wishing hehad grabbed his teddy to hold on to. In the distance he heard his mom cry out.It was a terrified cry.The boy had once promised hisdad he wouldn't leave his hideout until his mom or dad got him, but he couldn't let his mom be scaredand alone.He got out of his secret spot and went to the kitchen where he heard movement, Jay stopsto take in a shaky breath.His arms are compressing my head against him and all I can see are his bicep and chest. He found a man, a bad man.He knew he was because this man scared him morethan the villains in his cartoons.The man wasn't as tall as his dad, and where his dad was big, thisman's muscles were long and lanky.His skin was as pale as a ghost's.His thin blond hair just as light,coming a little past his ears in waves.He wore black, round spectacles that burrowed into his eyesockets.His lips reminded the boy of when he had cherry popsicles and his lips turned red, but onthis man the red lips terrified him.He wore all black, and his tank top made visible a tattoo thatsnaked around his neck and down his shoulders; it was the heads of dragons.The boy would laterlearn this tattoo started on his back as the body of a three headed dragon. That's what the boy saw as he took in the man who had his mom.She was crying and trembling.He had a hand to her throat.The boy froze in fear, because on that hand he had a leather band thatwrapped around his wrist and three straps that came up his three middle fingers like a glove.At thetips, over his nails, were three gold claws.They looked sharp; sharper than the knives his daddy keptin the drawer he wasn't allowed to go in. He believed what happened next could have been prevented if only he had been braver [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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. Chapter 318:16pmI finish wiping my face from washing the day away.I can't help but observe Jay and take him in.Tomorrow he'll have the file to give to Vault, and in return he'll get the dagger he needs to send mehome.I'll have to let him go all over again.My chest caves in.I'm not sure if I'm strong enough to say goodbye again (not like I did it all thatwell the first time around).How do I learn to let go and not have it crush me? I'm not sure that I can.I need him, if only for tonight.Not sexually; I just need to feel him one last time.I go to the side of his bed where he is watching the news and crawl on top of him, placing a bentleg on both sides.I wrap my arms tightly around his neck and bury my face in it's crevice.I breathe inhis scent and relish in the warmth of his body.His arms safely tuck me in and a hand starts strokingmy hair, the other securely embracing me.I breathe more of him in and soak in every memory I haveof him, praying I never forget a second of it. I love you, I exhale, needing to get the words out, wanting him to know before I don't have thechance to say it.His lips move against my temple and it makes me tighten my hold around his neck, If you'reworried about tomorrow, don't be.You don't have to do it.I'll find another way.I would prefer tohave to find another way. That's not what this is about.After tomorrow this will all be over and I'll never see you again.Last time I didn't get to say goodbye, or tell you how I'd never forget my time with you.I love you,Jay.I wanted to tell you.I know it's only one-sided, but I still needed you to know. I fight the tearsthat are blurring my vision and cling even tighter to him.Jay clutches me tighter as well, and the hand stroking my hair knots itself with the strands,pressing my face firmly to him. I want to tell you a story about a six year old boy named Noah Baxter, Jay inhales deeplybefore letting it all out in one big whoosh across my temple, ruffling my hair, giving me the tingles Iwill miss, He had a beautiful mom, with long blond hair he loved to touch because of it's softness,and the way it glowed like an angel's.She had a sweet, soft voice that never yelled, only soothed.Shecalled him her perfect boy even when he made mistakes or lashed out.This boy loved her macaroniand cheese, and even as a grown man can remember the taste in his mouth. One day, the boy and his mom were coloring in the living room when cries of terror came fromoutside.His mom rushed to the window and peeked out.The horror on her face frightened the boy.Hebecame scared when she yelled at him to go to his secret spot in the back of her closet.His mothernever yelled at him and he stayed rooted in shock.When she yelled a second time he obeyed and wentto the small, snug compartment his dad made him inside the closet wall and locked himself in.Hecurled up into a ball, and as he waited for his mom to come get him he trembled and cried, wishing hehad grabbed his teddy to hold on to. In the distance he heard his mom cry out.It was a terrified cry.The boy had once promised hisdad he wouldn't leave his hideout until his mom or dad got him, but he couldn't let his mom be scaredand alone.He got out of his secret spot and went to the kitchen where he heard movement, Jay stopsto take in a shaky breath.His arms are compressing my head against him and all I can see are his bicep and chest. He found a man, a bad man.He knew he was because this man scared him morethan the villains in his cartoons.The man wasn't as tall as his dad, and where his dad was big, thisman's muscles were long and lanky.His skin was as pale as a ghost's.His thin blond hair just as light,coming a little past his ears in waves.He wore black, round spectacles that burrowed into his eyesockets.His lips reminded the boy of when he had cherry popsicles and his lips turned red, but onthis man the red lips terrified him.He wore all black, and his tank top made visible a tattoo thatsnaked around his neck and down his shoulders; it was the heads of dragons.The boy would laterlearn this tattoo started on his back as the body of a three headed dragon. That's what the boy saw as he took in the man who had his mom.She was crying and trembling.He had a hand to her throat.The boy froze in fear, because on that hand he had a leather band thatwrapped around his wrist and three straps that came up his three middle fingers like a glove.At thetips, over his nails, were three gold claws.They looked sharp; sharper than the knives his daddy keptin the drawer he wasn't allowed to go in. He believed what happened next could have been prevented if only he had been braver [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]