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.What were you going to say about Guillaume?""He took care of me after our mother died," Mira said carefully."He was my onlyfamily.We went everywhere together.He earned money here and there, doingdifferent things, and I worked when I could.But it was not enough money to live on,so we had to& we had to do dishonest things in order to get more.Guillaume taughtme many things.We robbed people, lied to them, and conned them." Guillaume hadbeen pleased that she could'make friends so easily, because the more they had likedher, the more easily she had been able to take advantage of them."I hated it.I alwayshated what we had to do for money.I hated to hurt people& but it's so much worseto be hungry.You wouldn't understand what it's like."Alec made no reply as he pinned her with a shrewd stare."And even if I hadn't been so afraid of being hungry," Mira continued, "I would have done it all to please Guillaume.He was the only person in the world who caredabout what happened to me.He loved me I know he did and without him Iwould have been alone.I was afraid of being alone.But everything changed when Iwas fifteen, when I was working at a hotel in Paris as a chambermaid.Guillaumewould leave me for a few weeks at a time."A young girl, alone in Paris.Working in a hotel.Alec knew that she must havebeen uncommonly resilient to have survived that.She had to have been exposedoften to danger& yet she was not asking for pity, merely telling him the facts.Reluctantly he felt a twinge of admiration for her as he had once said, she did notlack mettle."At the hotel," Mira said, "I met Rand Berkeley for the first time.There was awoman with him they were not married, but they seemed to care for each other.The woman was Rosalie Belleau.She was ill, and I helped to take care of her whilethey stayed at the hotel.I went with Berkeley and Rosalie when they retired to thecountry for her to recuperate.During that summer I was her companion, and webecame very fond of each other." Mira smiled wistfully."But there were many thingsthat I did not know about Rosalie, including the controversy that was taking place inEngland at the time.She was rumored to be the illegitimate daughter of BeauBrummell.""Ah& " Alec nodded thoughtfully."I remember the scandal now& it was in all ofthe newspapers.The Berkeleys have since covered it up well, but Lady Rosalie hasquite a checkered past.""Yes.Guillaume, my brother, found out about it and followed me to the chateauwhere we were all staying.He was involved with a bad crowd of people, anorganization that extends from England to France.They convinced him to do terriblethings.I did not know what he and they planned, but I knew somehow thatGuillaume was making use of my friendship with Lord Berkeley and Rosalie, andthat he was going to take advantage of their trust in me.I didn't say anything, blindlyhoping that he would not do anything wrong.I was happy for the first time in mylife.I had a home and security, and I wanted it to go on forever.Berkeley andRosalie asked me to come back to England with them.I would have, but then& then ""Guillaume interfered?"Mira nodded slowly."Yes, Guillaume tore it all apart.He arranged to have Rosaliekidnapped, rightout from under Berkeley's nose.She was& she was sold tosomeone for a great deal of money, to someone who wanted her because she wasBrummell's daughter.And unwittingly I was the one who made it all possible.Myfriendship with Berkeley and Rosalie nearly ruined their lives." She closed her itchingeyes and rubbed them gently."I ran like a coward when I found out what Guillaumehad done.I couldn't face Berkeley; I was afraid he would kill me.I loved Rosalieand I wanted to die when I realized what she might have been suffering.I don't knowhow Berkeley got her back, but he did.Eventually I found out that things had turnedout well for them& but I was too overwhelmed with guilt and shame to approach them.During my stay with them I had learned many things, you see& I realized howmany people I had hurt, how many bad things I had helped Guillaume to do.So Ileft Guillaume and came here.He followed me, but I kept on running and hiding fromhim I didn't want his love anymore.""And that's why you're so distraught over their arrival tomorrow?" Alec askedwhen it appeared that she had finished.His tone was dry and faintly ridiculing, as ifher fear and shame had been unfounded."If not for me, all of those people wouldn't have been hurt, and Rosalie wouldnever have been kidnapped ""Wait& stop for just a second.You didn't intentionally help Guillaume arrangethe kidnapping, did you?""No, but ""Then you have nothing to feel guilty about," ' said matter-of-factly."But all the other people I stole from ""Do you really think they give a damn about your pangs of conscience? No.They've forgotten all about the dirty turn that some little French imp did to themonce, and they're going on about their lives as usualwhile you're here stewing andfretting over nothing.Mira, my mixed-up brat, you should put your energy to betteruse than this.""I'm not stewing over 'nothing,' " she said halfheartedly, beginning to feelcomforted by his practical assessment of the situation."I'm facing the very realproblem of how to leave here."Suddenly Alec's face hardened."Leaving is very simple, m'dear.Choose two or three of your favorite gowns, achange of undergarments, and a good pair of shoes.Throw them into a bag andsqueeze a little money out of Sackville before you go.Does that solve yourproblem? Or is there something that makes it difficult to walk out the door? Perhapsyou care for Sackville more than you thought you did? Or do you find that you arereluctant to leave the luxuries behind?""Now you're being hateful," Mira said, staring moodily at the open door of thepagoda [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]
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.What were you going to say about Guillaume?""He took care of me after our mother died," Mira said carefully."He was my onlyfamily.We went everywhere together.He earned money here and there, doingdifferent things, and I worked when I could.But it was not enough money to live on,so we had to& we had to do dishonest things in order to get more.Guillaume taughtme many things.We robbed people, lied to them, and conned them." Guillaume hadbeen pleased that she could'make friends so easily, because the more they had likedher, the more easily she had been able to take advantage of them."I hated it.I alwayshated what we had to do for money.I hated to hurt people& but it's so much worseto be hungry.You wouldn't understand what it's like."Alec made no reply as he pinned her with a shrewd stare."And even if I hadn't been so afraid of being hungry," Mira continued, "I would have done it all to please Guillaume.He was the only person in the world who caredabout what happened to me.He loved me I know he did and without him Iwould have been alone.I was afraid of being alone.But everything changed when Iwas fifteen, when I was working at a hotel in Paris as a chambermaid.Guillaumewould leave me for a few weeks at a time."A young girl, alone in Paris.Working in a hotel.Alec knew that she must havebeen uncommonly resilient to have survived that.She had to have been exposedoften to danger& yet she was not asking for pity, merely telling him the facts.Reluctantly he felt a twinge of admiration for her as he had once said, she did notlack mettle."At the hotel," Mira said, "I met Rand Berkeley for the first time.There was awoman with him they were not married, but they seemed to care for each other.The woman was Rosalie Belleau.She was ill, and I helped to take care of her whilethey stayed at the hotel.I went with Berkeley and Rosalie when they retired to thecountry for her to recuperate.During that summer I was her companion, and webecame very fond of each other." Mira smiled wistfully."But there were many thingsthat I did not know about Rosalie, including the controversy that was taking place inEngland at the time.She was rumored to be the illegitimate daughter of BeauBrummell.""Ah& " Alec nodded thoughtfully."I remember the scandal now& it was in all ofthe newspapers.The Berkeleys have since covered it up well, but Lady Rosalie hasquite a checkered past.""Yes.Guillaume, my brother, found out about it and followed me to the chateauwhere we were all staying.He was involved with a bad crowd of people, anorganization that extends from England to France.They convinced him to do terriblethings.I did not know what he and they planned, but I knew somehow thatGuillaume was making use of my friendship with Lord Berkeley and Rosalie, andthat he was going to take advantage of their trust in me.I didn't say anything, blindlyhoping that he would not do anything wrong.I was happy for the first time in mylife.I had a home and security, and I wanted it to go on forever.Berkeley andRosalie asked me to come back to England with them.I would have, but then& then ""Guillaume interfered?"Mira nodded slowly."Yes, Guillaume tore it all apart.He arranged to have Rosaliekidnapped, rightout from under Berkeley's nose.She was& she was sold tosomeone for a great deal of money, to someone who wanted her because she wasBrummell's daughter.And unwittingly I was the one who made it all possible.Myfriendship with Berkeley and Rosalie nearly ruined their lives." She closed her itchingeyes and rubbed them gently."I ran like a coward when I found out what Guillaumehad done.I couldn't face Berkeley; I was afraid he would kill me.I loved Rosalieand I wanted to die when I realized what she might have been suffering.I don't knowhow Berkeley got her back, but he did.Eventually I found out that things had turnedout well for them& but I was too overwhelmed with guilt and shame to approach them.During my stay with them I had learned many things, you see& I realized howmany people I had hurt, how many bad things I had helped Guillaume to do.So Ileft Guillaume and came here.He followed me, but I kept on running and hiding fromhim I didn't want his love anymore.""And that's why you're so distraught over their arrival tomorrow?" Alec askedwhen it appeared that she had finished.His tone was dry and faintly ridiculing, as ifher fear and shame had been unfounded."If not for me, all of those people wouldn't have been hurt, and Rosalie wouldnever have been kidnapped ""Wait& stop for just a second.You didn't intentionally help Guillaume arrangethe kidnapping, did you?""No, but ""Then you have nothing to feel guilty about," ' said matter-of-factly."But all the other people I stole from ""Do you really think they give a damn about your pangs of conscience? No.They've forgotten all about the dirty turn that some little French imp did to themonce, and they're going on about their lives as usualwhile you're here stewing andfretting over nothing.Mira, my mixed-up brat, you should put your energy to betteruse than this.""I'm not stewing over 'nothing,' " she said halfheartedly, beginning to feelcomforted by his practical assessment of the situation."I'm facing the very realproblem of how to leave here."Suddenly Alec's face hardened."Leaving is very simple, m'dear.Choose two or three of your favorite gowns, achange of undergarments, and a good pair of shoes.Throw them into a bag andsqueeze a little money out of Sackville before you go.Does that solve yourproblem? Or is there something that makes it difficult to walk out the door? Perhapsyou care for Sackville more than you thought you did? Or do you find that you arereluctant to leave the luxuries behind?""Now you're being hateful," Mira said, staring moodily at the open door of thepagoda [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]